In a Perfect World
by NikThomps
Summary: What happens when Theresa moves on with her life, just as Ethan realizes what a monster he truly married? Neither Pro ET, or Pro JT.  Contains romantic scenes of both.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing of the first few chapters! The Characters belong to J.E. Reilly and whichever network now owns the rights.

This story is neither Pro ET, not Pro TJ, though all the ET fans will hate me, and all the JT fans will hate me… it's a lose lose situation. _As the story progresses, there are a few love scenes. If anyone is uncomfortable with them, do let me know. The whole story isnt based on them, but they do happen. _ I started this fic years ago, and for some reason never finished it. After reading some of the amazing fiction on this site, I thought it would be nice to post it here, get some feedback, and maybe some inspiration to finish it. I have the first 20 chapters written, but am only posting the first few to see if there is any interest first. I hope you enjoy, and please read and review, so I know whether to continue. Without further ado, please enjoy **In a Perfect World**

**PS. A special thank you to my amazing friend, and unofficial beta reader JuliciousJules who gave up most of her evening to proof my first 20 chapters, you rock!  
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><p>Theresa awoke to the gentle rays of the sun as it crested the trees behind the mansion. She stretched out enjoying the feel of the silk sheets beneath her naked body. As her arm reached out, she felt the warm soft chest of her husband.<p>

She looked lovingly at his sleeping face, and smiled. She had it all, and more. The love she had always dreamed of… The family she had always wanted… and another baby on the way. Everything was Perfect… well Almost….

"Good morning Beautiful" He said, as he rolled over and Kissed her eyelids, then the tip of her nose. "How are my two favourite women today?" He was convinced that the new baby would be a girl… Daddy's little girl at that. But they had decided not to find out ahead of time. There were plenty of rooms in the Crane mansion, and it would be no trouble to get clothes and everything they needed sent over from the best boutiques as soon as the baby was born. Theresa was pretty sure half of them were on standby with the best (and probably most expensive) things in bags all ready to go as soon as the new Crane-Casey baby was born.

Theresa thought back, it had been a long tumultuous year, but they had come a long way… She thought back to one year ago today… and that fateful day at the Seacliffe Inn…

_"Oh… My… God…" Ethan had said as he had stormed out of the room… trying to get away … far away from the woman who had hurt him so much, the woman he loved, more than anything… making love to that… that…P…_

"…enny for your thoughts" said Jared pulling Theresa out of her memory.

"Just thinking about how desperately I want to make love to my husband" she replied, quickly covering up.

"I know, I know" He replied "but you know what Dr Eve said… you have to stay in bed, and no stress, and no strenuous activity… not until our little princess is born"

Theresa had been put on bed rest by Eve Russell. She had had a few episodes of early labour and contractions and they wanted her to hold out at least another week or 2.

"I know" she retorted "but it doesn't mean I can't fantasize" she gave him that sly grin that he loved so much.

"Why…" he kissed her cheek "don't I…" and he kissed the other "go and get you some breakfast" and he planted a kiss firmly on her lips.

"No…" she said "Stay here with me, I'll have cook send something up, and we can spend the morning together, in bed, just holding each other"

She had tried this trick before, but it wasn't going to work… he would do nothing to jeopardize her health, or his daughter's… Besides he had given the staff the morning off. They had been working very hard lately getting the nurseries ready.

"No… I can't do that…" he said sheepishly "I told them not to come in till noon since they have been so busy lately, making sure everything was ready for our little angel, and Fancy's too"

Fancy was due any day now… and it was playful competition guessing who would have their baby first. Thankfully Theresa had FINALLY convinced Luis to move into the mansion with them. He and Fancy had decided not to get married till after the baby was born, because Fancy wanted to look her best in her wedding dress, and Luis was leery of going through another live in situation until he knew he couldn't get hurt again. Finally Theresa's persuasion won out and Luis moved in, so that he could be there if she went into labour.

"Fine, Fine" Theresa said in mock despair "Leave your bedridden wife ALL alone in a big empty bed"

Jared slid out of bed, and put on his robe… "I will be back before you know it" he said "with my famous ham and cheese omelette" he winked.

"Well I suppose if THAT is the bargain, I can be persuaded" she said coyly. With that he left the room.

Theresa lay back down on her pillow, and her thoughts drifted back, once again…

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	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Once again I own nothing except the creativity behind my storyline.

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><p>"<em>Ethan wait! Please! Ethan!" screamed Theresa as she jumped up, shoving Jared aside. She grabbed a towel and ran into the hallway, barely covering herself, the sweat still dripping down her back.<em>

'I HAVE to move on' she thought… 'But Ethan… he looked so… so hurt.'

She looked up and down the hallway, but there was no sign of him. She sighed, feeling the weight of the world once again on her shoulders. 'What am I gonna do' she thought… as she slowly walked back to the room.

Jared was waiting with a hug when she got back.

"I'm sorry" she said.

"No Apologies" he replied… "He should have found out about us in a more… gentlemanly way"

"Exactly" said Theresa, "I'm so glad you understand"

And with that she had melted in his arms. She stayed the night that night… That night and every night to come. She had offered him a room at the Crane mansion because The Seacliffe was nice, but it was not a home… and even on his salary, Jared couldn't afford to stay there forever, and the mansion was so big… and so lonely… and she knew he could make her happy.

"One ham and cheese omelette, a glass of Milk AND a glass of juice, for the most beautiful lady in the world" he said coming in and balancing a breakfast tray on one hand while shutting the door.

It looked splendid. Breakfast laid out on the tray with fresh berries on the side, and a single red rose in a vase.

"Couldn't have you forgetting just how much I love you now could I?" he said as he saw her eyeing the rose. "I had the gardener cut it fresh from your bush."

'Ivy's bush' she thought with a laugh 'her Pride and Joy… Other than Ethan of course… but then Theresa had taken that too hadn't she…'

"I thought after breakfast, we could take a short walk in the garden, so you can get some fresh air… I even cleared it with Dr Eve. She said she will come by this afternoon to check up on you, but that maybe we can start to increase your activity levels just a bit if everything still looks good" he said with a sly smile "and don't forget to take your pill"

She looked and saw it at the side of her plate. Along with being on bed rest, she had been given special medication to stop the contractions. She hated taking them though, they tasted like chalk. But she knew it was best for the baby, so she took it and swallowed it with a gulp of milk.

Just then EJ came in with Jane and Edie, the nanny.

"Master Ethan has had his bath Mrs. Crane, as has Miss Jane" said Edie. "Shall I take them to the visiting room to await Mr. Winthrop?"

'Damn' thought Theresa. She had forgotten that today was Ethan's day to visit with the children.

"Yes please Edie…" she began… and as Edie started to leave the room she called her back "Edie… please, again, call me Theresa…"

"Yes Mrs. … Yes Theresa thank you" and they left the room.

There were few servants still left in the house from when she had been Mrs. Alistair Crane. She didn't want to remember much of those days and wanted to make sure that the staff that cared for her and her family was completely loyal to her. Of those few that had stayed Edie was her prize. Theresa could not have asked for a better nanny, and it didn't hurt that she was close friends with Pilar either. Although she and a few of the tenured staff had difficulty calling her by her first name.

It was Jared that insisted on it. It showed them respect, and it showed them that she didn't think of herself as worth more than they were. And it showed in their performance. And they returned that respect, not because they had to but because they wanted to. And although Theresa had retained the Crane name for business purposes, they all knew she was nothing like her late husband. And they admired that.

She ate quickly and got out of bed to dress.

"Hey, hey, hey. What do you think you are doing?" said Jared.

"Going downstairs to make sure that pregnant dog isn't with Ethan when he gets here to see my children." She replied bitingly "then we can go for our walk" she added sweetly… too sweetly as if trying to cover up her anger.

Ever since the truth had come out about her son's paternity… Ethan had been given supervised visitation with both him and Jane, once Theresa had won that custody battle. The stipulation was that Gwen was not to be within 500 yards of her children. When Ethan took them from the mansion Edie was to accompany them… along with a Crane driver. And they were both well versed in the protocol should Gwen come anywhere around the children. Ethan didn't like it, but that was the way the courts had ruled… and Theresa hadn't had to do anything at all… Gwen dug the grave herself this time…

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><p>Feedback is Loved and Appreciated :)<p> 


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: I still own nothing other than the creativity behind my storyline_

_Enjoy!_

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><p><em>It was the night of Theresa and Jared's engagement party. He had proposed a week earlier, at The Blue note… standing in the same spot she had spilled hot tea on him the first night they met… he bent down as if he had dropped something… and stayed on one knee… producing a beautiful, yet tasteful engagement ring… she had said yes on the spot. And now they were sharing their good news and happiness with all their friends.<br>Theresa looked ravishing in a red sleeveless evening gown it sparkled almost as much as her smile. Jared had stayed at her mother's all day. She didn't want him to see her until she made her entrance, and Mama's house was empty now that Martin and Katherine had returned to Puerto Arena. Theresa was ecstatic that she was FINALLY going to marry a man she loved, and who loved her as much as Jared did, but she had an unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach. Pilar had insisted that Theresa invite Ethan and Gwen tonight… if only so they would bring Jane to the mansion to spend time with Little Ethan. He missed his younger sister terribly. She was almost ready when a knock at the door startled her._

"Come in" she said

The door opened and in came Pilar. She looked worried.  
>"Theresita…" she began "I didn't want to tell you this, but now I think I must. There have been… disturbing letters coming to you recently… and today you got this..." she held a long slim box. And on top of it was a stack of opened envelopes. She handed Theresa the envelopes first. Each had been post marked a different day, from the past 2 weeks. There was one for each day. Theresa cautiously opened them.<p>

Each envelope had contained a picture of Ethan, with Little Ethan… and at the bottom of each picture were the words "Truth, or Dare" written in black marker. The only different one was the most recent… dated yesterday. It was a picture of Jared and her son instead. "Mama, what could these mean? And why didn't you tell me when you first got them?" Theresa asked, sounding shocked.

Pilar had fallen back into her role as head house keeper, unofficially. She had run the crane mansion for so long that she hated not having things done her way… so although she never lifted a finger… she watched over the staff… and made sure things were done her way. This meant that all mail for the household passed through her.

"Well Mija" began Pilar. "I didn't tell you because I thought they were some sick Joke… until this came not half an hour ago." She said, finally handing Theresa the box.

In it was another picture of Ethan and Little Ethan, with the word "truth" on it, and a folded piece of paper, that had the word "or' written on the outside. Theresa slowly unfolded the paper, and read it... she immediately went pale, and fell onto the bed… for what she held in her hands, were the results to the DNA test she had run secretly on Little Ethan, comparing Ethan and Julian as the fathers. Even she had not seen them yet, though here they were, in black and white. Ethan was Little Ethan's father.

"What do you think they want Mama" Theresa asked. It was then that she noticed the final contents of the box, which now lay on the floor at her feet. It was a sealed envelope, with one word written in black marker… 'Dare'

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><p>Feedback, as always, is Loved and Appreciated<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: Still own nothing_

_This chapter is really short, in hindsight, it probably should have been attached to the one before... or after... but it just didn't feel right that way._

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><p><em>Theresa slowly turned over the envelope. She could not bring herself to open it, so instead handed it to her mother.<em>

Pilar opened it hesitantly, and read the message inside.

'You tell, or we do' was all it said.

This was _**terrible**__, this would destroy __**everything**__! Theresa had JUST finished overthrowing Julian's attempt to get joint custody of Little Ethan, based on the fact that he had signed away all rights to the child when he had helped Gwen and Rebecca take him away from her, so that Gwen and Ethan could replace their dead daughter Sarah. Julian hadn't realized that he had nailed his own coffin shut with that one move. Theresa had brought that up in court, as well as the false CPS reports, and with Jared as her lawyer, Julian had stood no chance. Jared had also supplied the courts with information that Julian had attempted to bribe him into spying on Theresa, and as her attorney Jared knew that would be a final straw for the judge. The Judge had awarded custody on the spot, Full and Final, to Theresa._

"Mama," said Theresa shakily "Please get Jared, we need to talk…" and with that she sighed the deepest sigh, knowing that tonight she could lose the man she loved.

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><p>Feedback is still Loved and Appreciated<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: Still don't own the rights, wish I did, all I own is the creativity behind my story ideas. _

_This chapter is a little longer, and should hopefully make up for the really short one last time. Enjoy!_

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><p><em>Jared knew his wife still held a great deal of resentment for Gwen, so he helped her down the stairs. Even though the woman had not been a part of their lives for a long time, these 2 women had a past that you just don't forgive and forget. Gwen had tried to kill her many times; she had kidnapped Jane, not once but twice. And STILL the nut job would call on birthdays and holidays asking to talk to Ashley. The staff had been instructed to ignore all the calls, and redirect them to Crane security, or Harmony P.D.<em>

He looked over at her with concern and saw that distant faraway look she seemed to get often lately. He wondered what she was thinking.

Theresa started as there was a soft knock on the door. She knew the moment had come. The moment to tell Jared the truth and the whole truth this time. She had almost lost him once before by a lie of omission… she hoped that coming clean with him this time would earn her at least a few brownie points. If she didn't tell him… he would know soon anyway. Besides, she hadn't really known, not for sure. She just hoped this didn't change his mind.

Pilar opened the door for Jared, and excused herself, leaving them to talk privately.

"Theresa, is something wrong?" Asked Jared "the look on her face was a mix of shock, fear and heartbreak. "I thought I wasn't allowed to see you until the party, until your Grand entrance. You should have kept it a secret," he winked "because now I just want to rip that dress off of you…" he noticed his attempt to illicit a smile had failed. Now he was sure something was wrong.

"Jared…" Theresa began, he could hear the quiver in her voice and before she could continue, she began to shake. The tears were unmistakable now as they coursed down her cheeks.

He walked over and held her, silently reassuring her that everything would be alright.

"Tess…What is it? Nothing could be this bad." He was worried now; worried that something had happened to one of the children, that she had changed her mind. "Please Tess; tell me what is going on. I love you and we will get through this,

_**together**__." He pulled her closer and kissed her forehead._

"I… I can't," she sobbed "You'll hate me, just like everyone else… Everything I touch I ruin."

Something was terribly wrong, he knew that now. This was something that would be earth shattering. If only he could calm her down long enough to tell him what it was.  
>It was then that he noticed the paper she clutched in one hand. She held it, as it if was the most precious, and the most hated thing in the world. Could this be the source of her torment?<p>

"Tess, what is it Baby? Does it have something to do with that paper in your hand?" Slowly she nodded "May I see it" he asked.

Hesitantly she raised her hand, and reluctantly released the paper into his.  
>He looked confused at first, then the realization of what he held dawned on him.<p>

"Is this…?" he asked incredulously. She began once again to sob uncontrollably. "Where did this come from? How did you get this? Tess talk to me I don't understand."

He wrapped his arms around her again, hoping to calm her down, but it seemed to make things worse… so he backed away. She slumped onto the bed and cried "see? This is why it is so terrible! You can't even be near me! You hate me don't you, Just go on Jared, Leave! Every other man in my life has… Just Go!"

In two strides he was back at her side. Sitting on the bed holding her as she sobbed… he was in shock and didn't know what the information meant, but he knew she was hurting. Everything else could wait.

After what seemed like an eternity, she finally managed to calm herself. But still he held her. Afraid of what that paper meant, afraid she would leave him now, afraid she would go back to chasing Ethan. He wasn't sure he could take that.

"Jared I…" she began

"Shhh Tess, Shhhh" he tried to comfort her knowing it was not much comfort

"No Jared, I need to explain, and I am sure you must have questions" she said firmly

"Questions? Of course I have questions!" he said, sounding a little angrier than he realized. Up until this moment all he had felt was fear. "How long have you known about this?"

"Only since tonight," she replied, tears streaming down her cheeks again. "But I have suspected for awhile now." And with that she launched into the story of Rome, and J.T Cornell, the information on his PDA, and how she had convinced herself not to tell Ethan. And that even though the time matched up, there was still some small chance that Little Ethan could still be Julian's son. How she had requested the DNA tests the day before last week's trial, to assuage all doubts, but had just now received the results. It was then she showed him the letter, and the remaining contents of the box.

By the time he had finished reading, she was trembling again. "I wish you had told me…" he began

"I understand that we are through. This is a huge breach of your trust" she interrupted. "Why don't you go home, I can address the press and" she was interrupted by a passionate kiss. It caught her completely by surprise.

When they finally pulled apart, she started to talk again, but he put a finger to her lips "shhhh" he whispered, "my turn." He smiled at her lovingly and she nodded. "I wish that you had told me…" he pause fearing another interruption. When none came he continued. "I wish you had told me so I could have been there for you. This must have been terrible to go through on your own. The fear, the letters, the results… just the uncertainty of who fathered your child" he paused to take a breath, and as he did she cut in.

"The letters, the box, the results…" she trailed off "I had no idea until tonight. Mama has been screening my mail, and thought it was a joke, until tonight"

He sat quietly for a minute, deep in thought. For a minute she thought he wouldn't believe her, that he was going to walk away. Then he pulled her into a passionate embrace. The warmth of his kiss melted her completely, and she fell into him. Slowly he began to undress her, careful not to wrinkle the dress that she would wear to their public "debut" but for now he needed to hold her, needed to be close to her, needed to be inside her.

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	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: I own nothing but the creativity behind the ideas in my story._

_This chapter is a little racy. I hope no one is offended. If you are, let me know and I will know to tone down or rewrite future chapters! It is also fairly short, but even with its few words is important to further the story... Enjoy!_

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><p><em>He lay her down on the King size bed in the middle of her room, under the large bay windows, his hands caressed her sides, and gently cupped her breasts. He lowered his lips to her nipple, kissing ever so lightly. He was being gentle, too gentle. She needed to feel, she needed to feel his need, he was afraid of hurting her with all she had been through so far tonight. That didn't last long. She ran her had up the inside of his thigh, and found what she was looking for. Grabbing hard, but not hard enough to hurt, she heard him gasp, and fell the sudden hardening in her palm. Now she had his attention. She kissed his lips, hard, and giving him no opportunity to deny her, opened his lips with her tongue, the kiss was deep, and long, and in her hand she could feel his every enjoyment. She kissed his neck, nibbling slightly, and heard him hiss with pain, and delight all at once. She seemed to have immobilized him, until suddenly he flipped her and she was on her back. She felt his hands running inside her thighs getting ever so close, teasing her before they ran back down to her knees, inching higher every time, before they would drop back down. It was torture, and she was loving every minute. He delighted in the sharp intake of breath as he suddenly kissed the inside of her thigh, savouring her soft, sweet skin. He pinned her arms at her sides as he began to inch his lips, higher with each kiss, closer to the Promised Land…<em>

"Oh My God!" she heard. She gasped and threw him off, looking at the door. There he stood… mouth agape, his blue eyes showing nothing but the pain that he was feeling, the anguish of finding her in the arms of another man...

"Ethan!" She screamed and jumped up… but he faded from sight. Just the ghost of a memory that interrupted their every intimate moment. He hoped that when he took her as his wife, things would change, but feared they would not. She felt bad and tried to pull him back, knowing that it hurt him when this happened. But she didn't know how to make it stop. Deep down inside, in a place hidden from the rest of the world, she wasn't sure she wanted it to.

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><p>As always Feedback is Loved and Appreciated<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

_Disclaimer: I own nothing but the idea for this particular story. _

_Again a little short but there are longer chapters to come. Unfortunately having written this so long ago, I didn't appreciate the value of the longer chapters, so to make up for it, I will always try to update more than one chapter at a time... Enjoy!_

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><p><em>The time had come. Theresa wasn't sure that it would after she had pushed him away… but after tonight she knew they would no longer have any problems making love. Tonight they would tell the world. They would share their good news… the joining of their lives as one… and they would share that Jared was adopting Ethan's son. Tonight the whole world would know… tonight Ethan would know. She thought of telling him personally… but knowing that he had not told her personally that he and Gwen were taking Jane away… instead he had her served with court documents… well… Ethan should be getting Jared's petition right … about…<em>

"Ready?" Asked Jared, taking hold of her hand. Any insecurities she had were gone in that moment. He really did love her, she knew that now… and she knew that she had made the right choice… she hoped.

Anya, one of the maids quietly approached the couple. "They're ready for you ma'a – Miss Theresa"

Theresa took a deep breath, let go of Jared's hand, and wrapped her tiny arm into the crook of Jared's elbow… The 'proper' way for an unmarried couple in the spotlight to make an entrance. 'Deep breaths' she thought, and they began to make their way down the spiral staircase.

They entered the massive sitting room, which had been transformed into a party room for the evening. All of Harmony was here tonight… almost all of Harmony… she didn't see Gwen and Ethan yet… didn't they know it was rude to make their entrance after she did?  
>Maybe they had decided not to come… maybe Ethan couldn't face her, knowing the truth.<p>

The press stood at the ready… flashbulbs going off left and right. It was the story of the century, since daily private lives had printed the article about Theresa, Jared, and Ethan… Everyone had wanted to know who the richest woman in the world would choose. It was pretty cut and dried really… Ethan was already married so he wasn't an option… or was he? Theresa tried to shake the thoughts in her head. The past few nights she had had the most wonderful dreams. But puzzling too, since they were about Ethan and not Jared… about making love to Ethan… and Ethan telling her how much he loved it… Ethan telling HER how it was fate… Ethan telling her that Gwen deserved to know the truth. But alas, she knew it was just a dream… one that would never come true… Ethan would never say those things… so Theresa had to move on… and she could be happy with Jared… she WOULD be happy with Jared… whatever it took.

A hush fell over the room as Theresa and Jared stepped up to the podium, to make their announcement. Everyone in the room knew they were announcing their engagement… but still it must be formally done… to everything, a season.

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><p>Feedback is, as always, Loved and Appreciated<p> 


	8. Chapter 8

_Disclaimer: Only the ideas are mine, characters and the show they come from are not... _

_Hey guys! Sorry it's been over a week since I updated, it has been kinda crazy! I wanted to say thank you to Victoria for the reviews, and to Sarasd45 for the story alert subscription! You are my first subscriber! I know there are a few others who have read, and I appreciate it so much, it feels awesome to put something like this out there and know that there are people actually reading it. _

_As I mentioned before the first 20 chapters of this have been written for awhile, almost 3 years to be exact, so forgive me if the chapters are short, or they suck I try to update with more than one at a time for that reason. please know I dont intend for this to be a short story, but I hope to not drag it out forever either the newer chapters will hopefully be much longer :) Enjoy!_

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><p><em>They were already a half an hour late to their own party, what with Theresa having the adoption papers drawn up at the last minute. As they stepped up to the podium, she saw someone approach Ethan with an envelope, and decided this was as good a time as any.<em>

"Welcome Friends, Family, and Honoured guests. We delight this evening in your company. As many of you know, less than a year ago, I became the widow of Mr. Alistair Crane. Since that time, I have met and decided to spend my time with a wonderful man. He is knowledgeable in the boardroom, and provides me with sound advice in the workplace, and he is wonderful with my children. I have come to Love him Very Much, and we have decided to be married.

On the heels of this joyful news, I received other wonderful tidings. As many of you know. My Ex husband Julian Crane has brought a lawsuit against me for custody of my son, Ethan Martin Crane. If this custody were granted, that would then put all control of Crane industries into his hands, leaving it to be run in the same underhanded manner my late husband chose to do his business. This evening, I received irrefutable proof, that Julian Crane is NOT the father of Ethan Martin…"

Theresa waited as the gasps and murmurs from the crowd died down.

"This evening I was hand delivered the results of a paternity test I had done recently. These results show proof positive that the Father of my son is none other than Ethan Winthrop."

Ethan stood, Mouth agape that Theresa could do this. Could announce something like this in SUCH a public manner. Had she not learned from the last time? When she exposed HIS true paternity to the tabloids?

" I had wanted the chance to discuss this matter personally with Mr. Winthrop, but this evening I received some very threatening letters, which have apparently been coming to me for some time and been screened by members of my family and staff, saying that if I did not tell this evening, that they would reveal it all.

My fiancé Jared Casey and I have discussed the matter, and have petitioned the courts for Full custody, including the adoption of Ethan Martin by Jared Casey. We are hoping that this will put to rest, any further questions you may have about… who I will chose"

With that she laughed, making the joke at her own expense. She stole a glance at Ethan, who was holding the unopened envelope in his hand, a single tear rolling down his cheek.

"You Bitch!" the scream came from the back of the room. "You did this on Purpose! You are just trying AGAIN to steal my husband!" It was Gwen, ranting and raving and carrying on… The room fell quiet.  
>"At this time I would like to open the floor to any questions" Theresa said, without batting an eye.<p>

"I have a question" hollered Gwen "How long do you think it will take me to rip THIS child from your arms?  
>You're unfit Theresa. We adopted Little Ethan once, we WILL do it again. You are going to<p>

_**lose**__, then Ethan and I will move away and you will NEVER see your Precious Nathan or Ashley again!"_

Ethan stood there, too stunned to comfort or calm his wife.

"Thank you Gwen for those … Kind words." Said Theresa, her poise not faltering, not missing a beat. "I do believe however that you mean Ethan and Jane"

"I should have killed you when I had the Chance!" Gwen screeched, "When I sent that information to the tabloid, about Ethan being a Bennett, I thought I had gotten rid of you for good! But OH no! you just couldn't stand that I had won, that Ethan was MINE, and now even when you have Jared that STILL isn't good enough for you, you just can't stand that I have the man you want and you can NEVER have him... and that no matter how much he loves you he will always stay with ME out of his guilt for the death of my daughter! Poor shmuck doesn't even realize the baby wasn't his! She was just my way of making sure I won... and you lost" Gwen was insane with rage now. Spouting off things that she probably didn't even realize she was saying. Spewing truths to Theresa, the press, but most of all to Ethan.

"So much for your 'drug interaction' excuse Gwen. This time you aren't going to get off… because whatever pull you had before with your MOTHER being married to Julian… well let's just say I am STILL Mrs. Alistair Crane. You will not take my son, and you just gave me grounds to get my daughter back."

Gwen screamed, and launched herself at Theresa.

Flash bulbs started going off as Gwen locked her hands around Theresa's throat Jared struggled to pull Gwen off of Theresa, but it took the assistance of 2 of the Crane servants to help.

"My apologies to the press," Theresa said as she was able to catch her breath "we will have to reschedule our question and answer period, I need to lie down... but please, everyone, enjoy the party. I will try to join you in a little while"

With that Theresa left the room, Jared walking beside her, holding her up as she walked.

Behind her, people moved into the newly finished ballroom Theresa had had custom built for this occasion, completely tearing down Alistair's old party room.

Sam, instead of following the party goers had put handcuffs on Gwen and was leading her towards the door, as she screamed and struggled, hollering obscenities at Theresa who was no longer there.

When everyone was gone there was one person still in the room. There stood Ethan. Stunned, crying, and trying to compose himself. He needed to talk to Theresa, now. And he needed to get her alone. He knew that wouldn't be an easy feat, not with Jared watching her like a hawk right now.

'All those years' he thought. 'All those years she was telling the truth, and I didn't believe her.' Then it truly dawned on him "My wife..." he said out loud "my wife is a monster." His knees buckled beneath him, and he sank to the floor. Where he stayed and cried like a baby, alone, on the cold hard ceramic tiled floor, thinking about all that he had just lost.

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><p>As always, Feedback is Loved and Appreciated - It helps me improve ;)<p> 


	9. Chapter 9

_Disclaimer: Only the ideas are mine, characters and the show they come from are not... _

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><p>"... Theresa... Theresa?" Theresa snapped back to reality and out of her reverie, Jared was standing in front of her looking concerned. "You keep... going away on me" he said. Is everything OK? It's not the baby is it?<p>

'The baby' she thought, and looked deep into his eyes. Was that a hint of suspicion masked behind the his thoughtfulness? Theresa put on another of her dazzling smiles, and told him it was nothing, she just had so much on her mind 'like Ethan' she thought... then suddenly felt guilty. She still couldn't pinpoint where these thoughts had begun, only that they had been increasing in frequency since...

"Mrs C... Theresa, Mr Winthrop is at the door. Ms Hotchkiss is not with him, shall I show him in?" It was Henderson, formerly the Crane driver, he was now the doorman and head butler, since he was getting on in years and was no longer able to drive safely.

"Yes please Henderson" Said Theresa, suddenly filled with butterflies. She forced herself to be calm.

Before Henderson even had a chance to leave the room, Ethan strode in, with the largest grin Theresa had seen on his face since... well since the last time they had been together...

"It's official" He announced. "It's legal, and official, and it's over. The divorce was finalized an hour ago Theresa. It's over. Gwen moved the last of her things out of the house last night, now you can leave J... Oh" Ethan stopped as he noticed Jared sitting on the other side of the room, his enthusiasm falling quickly. "So how are things? Are you feeling Ok? How is the baby?" He said, gently rubbing her belly, oblivious to the shocked look on her face.

Jared sat in his chair stewing... he had known since their engagement party almost a year ago, that Ethan wanted Tess for his own, he also knew that his wife was committed to him, and their marriage, and now with this new baby on the way there was nothing that could come between them, so he decided to keep his mouth shut over Ethan's comments, there was no point in upsetting Tess.

"Ethan, I'm with Jared now, we have talked about this. You had your chance, and your choice, you chose Gwen. Just because that's over now doesn't mean you can settle for second best, because I won't be that. I won't be that for you, or for anyone else." She looked over at her husband and saw him smile. "There is some new paperwork that has to be signed though, as promised now that Gwen has moved out, and I am assuming the locks have been changed so that she no longer has access..." Ethan nodded so she continued "We agreed that you could start with overnight visitation once she was gone." she looked once again at her husband "Jared would you excuse us while we go sign the paperwork? Then Ethan and the children can go, and we can be off on our walk"

She noticed the resigned look on Jared's face as they prepared to leave the room, but he nodded just the same and Ethan followed Theresa out of the sitting room to the Library.

Once there he locked the door behind him and swept Theresa into a passionate kiss, it was only seconds before she pulled away, but it felt like a lifetime, for time seemed to stop when they were in each other's arms.

"So you haven't told him yet" Ethan said

"There's nothing to tell Ethan. We are married, we took vows or have you forgotten that?"

"No," he said "but I also haven't forgotten that last night that we spent together eight months ago... The night before your wedding, where you pledged to love another man with all of your heart till death do you part... but that isn't true is it Theresa, because you still love me, you know that you do..." He pulled her into another kiss, this time caressing her arms and her breasts as he did. She felt her nipples involuntarily harden at the sudden unwelcome [and yet very welcome] stimulation. Pulling away before it could go any further, she hurried over to her desk and pulled out a stack of papers.

"These are the amendment papers as promised Ethan... sign them and go. On your next visit you can take the children overnight, if they want to... but if they don't..." She stopped. Of course they would want to, EJ loved Ethan and wanted to spend every possible moment with him. That was the reason Jared hadn't adopted him, because EJ had asked them not to.

"What about a family sleep over?" Ethan asked making his way over to her once again "that way if they feel uncomfortable since it is a new situation, mommy is there... and after they're in bed we can..."

"No Ethan! I am going through a difficult pregnancy, it's hard enough making sure I stay calm without you pulling these crazy stunts, and if Jared thought for one minute that I was risking his baby..."

"His baby?" Ethan asked raising an eyebrow "So you still haven't told him about the possibility that its mine?"

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	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Only the ideas are mine, characters and the show they come from are not...

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><p>"SHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" she hissed at him angrily, "This baby is NOT yours Ethan," she said through clenched teeth. "you had your chance, we had our children, and even if Eve were to come back and tell me that there was no way Jared could be the father of this baby... he would still always BE the father of this baby, as far as I am concerned and as far as he will ever know" anger flashed in her eyes.<p>

He had seen this anger before; usually it was accompanied by a slap to the face, so he carefully took a step back without making it obvious. But even that step back was too much, just being this close, yet so far away was torture. It was hard enough when he had been married to Gwen, and his conscience had told him that no matter what he had to stay away from Theresa, but now...

"SIGN the papers Ethan... " Theresa said "sign them, and you can have the children overnight next weekend, and I will promise you more overnights with them especially when _Jared's_baby is born" she stressed the word as hard as she could, knowing that he would get the hint, but she also knew that it must be killing him to hear her talk like this. Still, he had made his choice, over and over again, no matter how many times he told her he had loved her he had chosen Gwen. Time and again, he had broken her heart, and now that the roles were reversed, she couldn't understand how he had done it, because just to deny him even a hint of sympathy or an ounce of the affection she was holding back was tearing her apart.

He was silent for a few minutes, thinking about what to say, and about how to say it. Finally he spoke. "Could you really do that? Could you really deny me my child? Could you really deny that child her own father?" he said her easily as he had heard Theresa and Jared talking about their daughter many times. In his heart, he was sure the baby was his, no matter what Theresa said, and he was going to make sure he knew it. "Theresa, I know I was a fool, for so long I was a fool, I didn't listen, didn't want to listen, didn't want to believe all those horrible things about Gwen... "

"But you were willing to believe them about me Ethan... do you know how much that hurt me? to know that no matter how many times I told you the truth, that you didn't trust me... didn't love me enough to believe me?"

"it had nothing to do with Love Theresa, nothing at all... you had," he paused, the word lied sounded so harsh " you had stretched the truth so many times, I didn't know what to believe anymore, and Gwen...I had known her all my life and I didn't want to think that..." he realized that defending Gwen was going to dig himself deeper than just admitting the error of his ways " I was wrong Theresa, I was wrong to be with Gwen, I was wrong to believe Gwen, and I was wrong to believe IN Gwen... I know that now, I know that I was wrong and I wish to god I could fix it, but to deny me my child is wrong too. That child, we created that child out of love, and you weren't breaking any vows, you weren't even married yet..."

"It was the NIGHT before my wedding Ethan!" she said trying desperately to keep her voice down, fearing Jared would hear, and everything she had worked so hard for would be over. "It was wrong, and it is never going to happen again! You don't love me Ethan, you might have thought you did, but you didn't, I was always the second choice, always the afterthought, you had your wife, and you wanted me on the side, and now that she's gone, and you see her for the monster she is, you want me so that you don't have to be alone. But I am NOT alone Ethan! I moved on, I found happiness and I am not going to let you take that away from me, not now not ever!" with that she broke down in tears

Ethan couldn't take it, he couldn't stand to see her cry. He never could. He closed the distance between them in two steps and wrapped his arms around her. She tried to resist at first, but quickly gave up and melted in his embrace. He leaned down and kissed her, and despite all her rantings about how wrong it was... she kissed him back.

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><p>Feedback is always Loved and Appreciated.<p> 


	11. Chapter 11

_Disclaimer: Only the ideas are mine, characters and the show they come from are not... _

Really short chapter, sorry guys! but there are more being posted so that should count, right? Enjoy!_  
><em>

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><p>Jared couldn't believe his ears. Theresa and Ethan? But she was his wife! And pregnant with his... he felt his knees buckle beneath him... pregnant with Ethan's Child! But it wasn't possible, was it the night before their wedding? Theresa had gone home to spend the night at her mothers, and Jared had called. Pilar told him that Theresa was in the bath and couldn't come to the phone, even when Jared had persisted, but all along... had she been with Ethan?<p>

He heard her pushing Ethan off, telling him it was Jared's baby, but was it? Jared wanted to burst through the door and demand a blood test, demand he be told the truth damnit!

But even as he put his hand on the other doorknob he could hear Ethan mocking his demands.  
>"You can't handle the truth Jared" the classic line given to losers like him, and if he played this wrong, then he would lose... everything. His Wife, his baby, his family...<p>

Ethan was pushing enough for both of them anyhow, and pushing her away, right back into his arms. Jared walked away from the office absently wiping away the tear rolling down his cheek and completely unaware of the silence that had overcome the room on the other side of the door.

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	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: Only the ideas are mine, characters and the show they come from are not...

Another short one, the next few are like this. Enjoy!

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><p>It took a moment for Theresa to realize she had let her guard down she pulled away and slapped Ethan full force across the cheek, as she had many times before. She regretted it instantly, but didn't let it show. Fire flared in her eyes but she could feel the ice in her veins and it wasn't reduced by the guilt she felt over slapping him. She felt violated, she was a married woman and not to him<br>_He had his chance_ she thought again, _he had his chance and he made his choice. _ The thought infuriated her further and she could feel the blood, icy cold in her veins begin to boil. "you made your choice Ethan..." she reminded him through clenched teeth "you made your choice and you chose Gwen" she felt a cold sweat break out on her forehead, but passed it off as anger and continued.  
>"For years I wasn't going to move on, refused to give up on us on FATE Ethan, I believed in our fairytale long after your life became a horror story with Gwen. But you never believed; you never saw what we had and COULD have had you said you did Ethan, you said you saw it and that me and the kids were all that were missing from your life" she paused to wipe away the tears streaming down her cheeks. "You remember don't you Ethan? You remember that night at the Blue Note? 'I don't have you.'" she said deepening her voice in her best imitation of him. She could tell her words were cutting him but she continued anyway..."'I don't have you. I don't have the woman who's really in my heart. I don't have the woman I truly love. I don't have her. I should be with you. I should be with Jane and little Ethan and you. God, Theresa, I should be with you!' you remember that night Ethan right? Right before you and that monster took my daughter away from me? Well now I have her back... have them BOTH back no thanks to Gwen or to you for that matter." Her anger was getting the better of her now, and she knew she should stop, but she couldn't. She was so furious that the room had begun to spin around her. You broke my trust Ethan, and more importantly my heart, and STILL I loved you, still I fought for you, fought for US, but you didn't care. Gwen was your golden girl, innocent of all wrongs, never did anything to hurt anyone... anyone but me and my children. Well I'm done Ethan, do you hear me? DONE! I'm married and I love my husband and no matter how much I L..."<p>

Suddenly everything went black, and she felt herself falling, felt him catching her and the last thing she heard was him calling her name.

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	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I own nothing other than the ideas behind my own story lines. The characters and Original Story are not mine.

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><p>She could hear things all around her but couldn't open her eyes. Jared was calling her name, begging her to wake up, begging her to be ok. She felt a sharp pain in her abdomen and winced, or at least thought she did. She heard Ethan calling out to her and Jared telling him to back off. None of it seemed to bother her thought.<p>

Suddenly Dr Eve was there asking what happened. She could hear Ethan explaining they had fought and that she had gotten upset, and fainted.

"Call 9-1-1" she could hear Eve say, and she heard one of them scramble to the desk "Her blood pressure is too low and I can't revive her. Tell whoever is on the line that we need to get her to the hospital immediately, or we could lose her" She could hear Jared on the phone repeating all the information Eve had given him.

She felt someone take her hand and knew instantly it was Ethan.  
>"I'm so sorry Theresa, God I am So Sorry. It seems I am always apologizing for hurting you and yet here I am doing it again, you have to wake up Theresa, you have to. I can't lose you. I swear you have to be Ok, our - Your baby has to be Ok or I will never forgive myself."<br>She felt something wet drip on her hand and realized he was crying. She tried to reach out to him but couldn't. Now she was scared, another sharp pain in her abdomen and this time she heard herself moan softly.

"Is she coming to?" Jared this time "Theresa, Tess baby talk to me, say something, tell me you're OK, Tell me... Oh my God Eve... the baby! Is the baby OK?

She felt the Dr put a hand on her belly, just as another pain ripped through her lower body, pushing all the way to her back and down into her legs.

"She's having contractions and her blood pressure is dropping, we're going to lose her AND the baby if we can't get her to a hospital fast."

She heard Ethan mutter quietly to himself "The Crane ambulance..." then louder to the Dr "What about the Crane ambulance? The one ..." he paused, remembering the circumstance of its purchase "The one Theresa bought to help me, can anyone drive it?"

The room was silent for a moment, then Jared answered "I think I can." another silence then he explained "I worked my way through college as a mover, the ambulance should drive similar to the truck"

"Ok Jared, " said Eve "You go and pull the ambulance to the front door, don't bother with the stretcher Ethan can carry her out we don't have time to waste trying to get the stretcher open."

Theresa didn't have to see to be aware of the hesitation in her husband, but he said nothing more before she heard his footsteps leaving the room. She felt Ethan's arms gently lifting her off the floor as another pain tore through her lower body, by far the worst one yet, and as she lost consciousness again she felt a peculiar wetness spreading between her legs...

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	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I own nothing but my own creative ideas

So I decided that to lengthen the chapters a little, I was going to combine a few, as such I no longer have 20 chapters written, however I have what I feel is a more fulfilling read in this chapter. I re-organized a few things, melded some chapters and added to it. I just hope I didn't disrupt the flow too badly. Enjoy!

Also, I realize in all my wisdom (note:sarcasm), that the notification of subscribers must be flawed, as every time I post a new chapter, there are people who read it almost immediately, but I have only ever received one subscription notification. A special thank you to Victoria who without fail has reviewed every update. Even with just a few loyal readers, I am encouraged to keep posting.

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><p>It had been days since she collapsed. He and Jared had called a temporary truce, so they could sit in shifts at her bedside. Jared had gone home just a few hours ago to check on the kids, and get some rest. Ethan sat at her bedside just watching her. He could almost pretend she was sleeping peacefully, if it weren't for all the tubes and machines. Her water had broken, and they had had to deliver the baby by Caesarean, Theresa had lost some blood, but not enough to explain the coma she was in. It was like she had shut herself off from the world and at the worst possible time too. The baby had been early, and more than anything she needed her mother, needed her to hold, comfort and feed her. There were some complications, the extent of which the Dr didn't know yet, they had given her surfactant for her lungs, and she was being tube fed, because they didn't want to risk bottle feeding her in case it interfered with breast feeding when Theresa woke up. Ethan had stood more than once at the nursery window looking at the precious little angel in the bassinet and wondering if he could be her father. He didn't dare tell Jared, this just wasn't the time. But he knew that time would come, and soon. The Drs were talking transfusions if her immune system didn't improve, and she wasn't clotting as well as she should be, but all of this could be because of being premature, which meant she could grow out of it... but she might not.<p>

He took Theresa's right hand in his left, leaning on his right hand as he studied her delicate hands, remembering just how wonderful they made him feel, whether it was a touch on his face, or a soft caress down his back. Just thinking about it reminded him of that night on the beach, the night they had conceived Ethan Jr., the night before their wedding day...If only Gwen hadn't destroyed that, hadn't plotted and schemed to ruin his love for Theresa, then HE would be her husband right now. There would be no question of the paternity of that beautiful little girl, and there would be no guilty feelings about the love he still held in his heart for another man's wife. A tear ran down his cheek as he kissed her hand, and begged her again to come back to him, to come back to their children, but the monitors showed no change. He sighed and closed his eyes to pray, and sleep took him just like that, head on his hand, with Theresa's hand in his, the only sounds in the room the beep and swish of the heart machine and respirator.

_He sat there, on the floor for what seemed an eternity. Anguishing over the past 10 years spent protecting her. 10 years spent pushing Theresa away while Gwen sat on her high horse, being married to him had made her part of the "in" crowd, Harmony's who's who, all the while she had been sitting on Theresa's rightful throne, sleeping in the bed he should have shared Theresa, raising Theresa's children, and calling Theresa a liar. All the while, the liar had been her. She was a wolf in sheep's clothing, but the farmer had finally caught her... and she was going down. If nothing else she was going down. His first priority though had to be stopping Theresa's wedding to Jared. Now that he knew the truth this was his chance! He couldn't let Jared take Theresa away from him! And his SON! Little Ethan was his SON! This truth hit him almost as if he hadn't heard it at first hadn't read the papers served to him. He looked down at the tear stained pages in his hand, and realized that he had left the DNA results on top. The words "Test result: match 99.9% positive" seemed to jump off the page at him, and further down. "Although a DNA test cannot be reported as 100% accurate, this test has concluded with 99.9% certainty that Ethan Winthrop is indeed the father of Ethan Martin Crane."  
>He felt again as if the world was closing in on him, and fought the urge to scream, knowing that it was futile and would only create a scene. He heard someone calling his name but he couldn't focus enough to see where the voice was coming from. Someone put a hand on his shoulder<br>"Ethan... Ethan are you alright mijo?" It was Pilar, and she hadn't called him that in years, not since he and Theresa had been engaged to be married. He stood up and looked into her eyes, and let out a strangled cry from deep in his throat and wrapped his arms around her. She would understand... she had to understand. She knew he loved Theresa, more than anything.  
>"Pilar you... you've got to help me. What have I done?" He sobbed, letting out 10 years of emotions held so deep inside "How do I fix this, how do I make it right?" His world was so out of control, and he had no one else to turn to, feeling like everything depended on the woman in front of him... That his every success hinged on her response he looked deep into her eyes and pleaded with her "How do I stop her from marrying Jared? Pilar, how do I bring her back to me?"<br>She pulled him close to her and let him cry, and whispered to him "I don't know Mijo, I just don't know..."_

The memory melded into a dream; A wonderful dream about their life together. He, Theresa, EJ, Jane, and Emily. They were so happy together. Jared had found out that Ethan was Emily's father and had stepped down without a fight, not that it would have made a difference, Theresa loved HIM, and there would have been no fight her choice had been made years ago, when they first met as children...

_They were sitting in the living room of the Crane Mansion, in front of the big screen TV, together. Emily had wanted a camp out in the backyard, but it was raining, so Theresa and Ethan had set up their sleeping bags on the floor, and had arranged the furniture back around the walls so that they could have enough space. Theresa had arranged for everything to be draped in brown and green fabrics so that it looked like "The Great Outdoors". _ _On the screen was the fireplace channel. It wasn't a campfire, but it made Emily happy. In the kitchen Melina, the chef was singing a childhood campfire song, while making 'smores for them. Theresa giggled and began to sing along, inciting Ethan and the children to join in. _

"_Black socks they never get dirty, _

_The longer you wear them the stronger they get. _

_Sometimes I wish I could launder them,_

_Something keeps telling me no no not yet… not yet, not yet, not yet._"

"_In a round! " Theresa hollered as she jumped up and pulled Emily to her feet, dancing in circles while they sang at the top of their voices. Ethan laughed so hard he was almost crying, when something bounced off his forehead. He opened his eyes to see EJ, Nerf bow and arrow in hand, aiming at him with a huge grin. _

"_Mom I got it! I shot the BIG GRIZZLY BEAR!" he said mischievously. _

_Ethan playfully acted out an exaggerated death scene, it wouldn't win an Oscar, but Emily was laughing hysterically._

"_MMMmmmmmm, Dinner!" yelled Jane playing along_

"_I'll show you dinner!" hollered Ethan jumping to his feet, grabbing Emily around her waist and swinging her around, tickling her and pretending to eat her belly._

_They fell into a pile in the middle of the room, laughing and tickling each other, and that is how Melina found them, arriving with the smores, as well as hot dogs and chips. The kids went running for the smores first of course, and Theresa cleared her throat loudly. "Do we eat dessert before dinner?" she asked pointedly? _

"_Aww mom!" said EJ "but the smores will get cold! And they're better warm!"_

"_He's right, you know" Ethan said putting his arm around Theresa, inching closer. Suddenly he was tickling her again "Quick!" he yelled to the children "while I have her distracted… Just make sure you save me one!" he continued tickling her until they fell over. Then he leaned down and kissed her passionately, marvelling that she was finally his._  
>He had fought it for years, the love they had, the fate that brought them together again and again, had fought it for what he thought was the right thing, the right woman. How stupid he had been, to deny true love for guilt, and obligation, and later on for punishment... He wouldn't be with Theresa, would deny his heart, because of some of the horrible things he thought she had done to Gwen... when it turned out Gwen had done much worse to her. And it had seemed too late to make it up to her...<br>But now, behind closed eyes, he could see perfection. The life they had always dreamed of, come true. A new dream took hold in his mind. EJ was a young man now, getting ready to go to law school, just like his father, and Jane, who was two years behind, wanted to be a teacher. Emily was just entering her teen years, and she was the spitting image of her mother, in both appearance and personality. She was headstrong, and determined to get her way, and she knew how to turn on the charm to get what she wanted. The advantage was that she wasn't as accident prone as her mother had been at her age, so Ethan didn't have to worry about any young men coming to his door complaining about paint and barbecue sauce. They had the perfect life together and he couldn't help but smile to himself as he lay stretched out in bed beside her, holding her in his arms and hearing her whisper how much she loved him, he could hear the kids downstairs boiling water for tea, he leaned over and kissed her lips and smiled as the kettle began to whistle...  
>"I need a crash cart!"<br>Suddenly there was a bustle of movement around him and Ethan realized he wasn't lying comfortably in bed, and that wasn't the whistle of the kettle he heard. He was in Theresa's hospital room, and there were people all around him, one nurse was asking him to leave the room as Theresa's heart monitor showed a flat line...

"Charge 100! Clear!" he heard, watching Theresa's limp body twitch slightly as 100 Joules of electricity raced through her body. "Charge 150!" said the Dr as the first shock delivered no results.

'_This is nothing like the movies_' He thought, watching another twitch. '_in the movies their whole bodies jerk, maybe it's not working. What if it's not working?_' He tried to run back to her side but a hand stopped him.  
>As he was lead out of the room an ominous feeling crept over him, and without even waiting to get to the chapel, he dropped to his knees right there in the hallway and prayed that this couldn't be his fate, that he wasn't about to watch her die, that God wouldn't take her away from him again, not now, not when he was so close to his perfect life... not now when those dreams could finally come true. With an anguished sob, he prayed…<p>

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><p>As always, feedback is Loved and Appreciated. Thank you<p> 


	15. Chapter 15

Terrible Terrible writer that I am it has been too long since an update, I apologize. Again I have merged a few chapters, attempted to make it a little bit longer, but didn't succeed much. so instead I will update two chapters at once :) Warning: this chapter is a little racy... ;)

Disclaimer: I own nothing aside from the creativity behind my own storyline. All Characters and original stories belong to the owners of Passions.

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><p>She could hear the bustle in the room around her, but everything was dark there was a single spotlight surrounding her but she couldn't determine the source of the light and as she moved through the room trying to find something, someone the light seemed to follow her. Not on an angle, though, like most spotlights, but from directly overhead and following her as if suspended on a thread above her.<p>

"I should have bumped into someone by now... a doctor or a nurse" she thought "or even a cupboard, or the bed.." she said suddenly realizing that she was no longer lying in a hospital bed.

Suddenly a long Corridor in front of her lit up with pictures on either side, Theresa walked slowly towards it and noticed that just before the entrance to the hall was a small welcome mat with her name on it, as if someone were expecting her, she stepped into the hall cautiously, and looked up at the first picture on the wall, It was Pilar holding a tiny baby in a pink hat. Beside her was Theresa's father, Martin, and Antonio and Luis, but they were younger, much younger. This was Theresa as a baby. She continued down the hall looking at photographs and still shots of her life. The doll Ethan had given her as a child, her sweet 16th birthday, the day she had spilled blue paint all over Ethan, their night on the beach, their wedding day that had been ruined by Gwen... The good, the bad... Every important detail of her life seemed to be chronicled in this hallway.

She stood in front of one, and felt a tear moisten her cheek...  
><em>It was their first date... unofficially of course... He was taking her to see Cinderella, and he looked just like Prince Charming, stunningly handsome in his tux, and she felt just like a Princess wearing one of Fancy's old dresses... It was a little long, but that just added to the princess like feel as it swept the tops of her feet. He escorted her out of the house to the limo... a real live limousine! She could die in this moment and be happy forever. The ballet was fantastic and she spent half of it daydreaming it was her and Ethan on that stage. When it was all over Ethan drove her home, and kissed her cheek, an innocent friendly kiss, but she vowed never to wash that cheek again...<em>

She continued walking down the hall seeing the day EJ had been born, and Jane, meeting Jared, the engagement party, the court battle for the children, and her wedding day to Jared, but what caught her attention was the picture of the night before her wedding, Her last night with Ethan. Could that night truly be the night that began her daughter's life?

_She remembered being at Mama's, and the phone ringing, it was Ethan and he said it was important, she had to come right away, then he hung up. Theresa was worried it was something wrong with the children, They were at Ethan's tonight and he was dropping them at the church tomorrow... she knew that she shouldn't go that she should ask mama to go, but she told mama that she was going out for a walk and would be back soon, that she wanted to enjoy the beautiful night air._

It didn't take long to get to Ethan's she knocked quietly on the door, afraid that she would wake the children if they were sleeping and Ethan opened even before she finished knocking. He grabbed her and pulled her in the door and before she knew what was happening, he was kissing her. She melted in his arms despite all her resolve not to, and felt his hands slowly caressing her sides, it wasn't until he paused mid kiss that she realized he was taking her shirt off, she fought it for a moment but gave in, she wanted this as much as he did. She ran her fingers up his sides and down his back she tried to lift his shirt but he was too tall, he bent down to pick her up and she locked her legs around his waist, lifting his shirt as she went. She leaned in and kissed his chest, that sensitive spot right in the middle with a small, almost invisible tuft of chest hair, and heard him take a sharp breath. They were almost to the bedroom now, and she looked around.

"What about Jane and EJ?" she asked

"They've been asleep for hours" he replied

He carried her into the bedroom and set her gently on the bed. Immediately she began to unbutton his pants, before he had a chance to walk away. She pulled them down, bending over to push them as far down as she could then began to gently kiss the insides of his legs on the way back up, she reached up to caress him as she hooked her fingers into the waistband of his black silk boxers, her favourite boxers, he had spared no chance that she would say no. Running her fingers up and down the inside of his thighs, she felt his muscles twitch. She reached just a little further up and grasped him in her hand, feeling him tighten between her fingers. He moaned in pleasure as she alternately caressed softly and tightened her grip, just barely letting go to ensure he didn't get away. Gently, slowly she lowered her lips to her hands and kissed him gently, teasing and taunting with her tongue, until she felt his knees ready to buckle, then she dropped to her knees and took him between her lips, fully and deeply, and heard him moan in rapturous delight. She bit down slightly, careful not to clamp her teeth tightly together but just enough to cause pressure, and heard him moan again. He grabbed her hair and pulled her up kissing her deeply, then pushed her roughly to the bed. He lowered himself to her and kissed her gently on the stomach, then moved slowly down, unzipping the zipper to her pants with his teeth, never taking his eyes off her face as he did. The look of pleasure was awe inspiring. He pulled her pants slowly over her hips, revelling in how perfect she looked lying there, and admired the lacy red thong she was wearing. He bent down and placed a kiss on either side of it, feeling a shudder run through her legs, then ran his tongue along the lace all the way down the middle, pausing briefly to move it slightly to the side so that he could taste what lay underneath. She moaned in pleasure, any feelings of guilt in the past, and focussing only on the present, this moment, and the moments to come. They continued on that way, pleasuring each other until neither could take it anymore, and when he finally entered her it was like their bodies were made for each other and no one else. The passion sparked, and ignited the room and she could feel him pushing harder and deeper inside her, so hard that it almost hurt, but sent waves of pleasure coursing through her instead. Finally when she thought she could take no more, she felt him explode, filling her with his warmth, and then he kissed her, Hard at first taking her breath away, but slowly it became more gentle, more loving, until he rolled over and just held her in his arms, occasionally kissing the top of her head. They lay like that until they fell asleep in each other's arms.

Theresa woke to the sound of Jane crying and sat up in bed. Realizing where she was she panicked, it was 5 am, and it was her wedding day! Quickly she got up and tiptoed out of the room, she got Jane a bottle and changed her diaper and put her back to bed, then quietly left the house, vowing that if Ethan were to show up at her wedding, and ask her not to marry Jared, the wedding would be off...

Realizing the wetness on her cheeks had become more than just a single tear, Theresa wiped away the torrent that had overcome her and composed herself. Ethan hadn't tried to stop the wedding. He hadn't even come. He had dropped the children off and left, and Theresa had vowed that never again would she be taken by his attempts to win her back.

She carried on down the hall looking at the events since her wedding to Jared when suddenly the hall went black. A single light up ahead showed her a scroll, almost as if guiding her to it.

_Before you lie three doors, one to heaven, one to hell, and one to life once more. Our choices past and present determine our futures, and here lies the final choice. Choose wisely, as you will not get a second chance_

Theresa looked ahead of her and saw three large wooden doors, all identical with no markings or indications which might lead to where. She walked towards them, and looked around them; behind them was just the back of a door, as if they were suspended in the middle of the room, but where they would lead, only God would know. After circling them a few times and realizing that this would not help her to choose, Theresa closed her eyes, and let her heart guide her to the middle door. Slowly she turned the handle and stepped through...

Jared arrived and heard the code blue, his heart sunk and he raced down the hall to Theresa's room. He stopped short halfway there, when he recognized Ethan on his knees in the hall. He was praying, Jared knew that much, but it struck him suddenly that the other man was crying as well. Never before had he put much thought into how much Ethan must care for Theresa. All Jared had ever seen was Ethan's actions hurting Theresa and making her cry, but still he knew that in her heart she loved him. Jared rarely thought about that. He loved his wife so deeply and desperately, that to acknowledge that there was another man in her heart meant that he could lose her, and that thought was unbearable. Not when she reminded him so much of Arabella. He thought back to the first time he had met her...

_It has been a week since the funeral, and he couldn't bear to spend another moment in that apartment. The blood had been cleaned off the walls and the carpet had been replaced, but he still couldn't stand the images that floated through his mind every time he closed his eyes. Arabella staring at him, her eyes fixed and glazed over, and the blood... he had to get away.  
>He found himself in a small town called Harmony; an ad said the wife of the tyrannical billionaire, Alistair Crane, was looking for a new assistant. He had heard many things about the young Mrs Crane, gold digger and bed hopper not the least of them. But he didn't have to like her to work with her, and he needed the money, and the fresh start.<br>He checked into a posh inn called the Seacliffe. It was nice, quiet and on the outskirts of town so he didn't have to worry about being interrupted by the noise, the onlookers, or the town gossips.  
>In the hotel lobby, he saw a poster for The Blue Note, a jazz club in town that promised good food, good drinks and best of all Great music. He walked in and walked up to the bar to get a drink, he was about five feet from the bar when some tiny brunette whipped around and walked straight into him spilling boiling hot tea all over his midsection.<br>"You IDIOT" he hollered not even bothering to look at her "why don't you watch where you're going?"  
>She began to apologize profusely, and it was then that he finally looked up. What he saw nearly knocked him off his feet; it was Arabella, his wonderful Bella. But it wasn't Bella, her hair was darker, her skin too, but everything else, down to the beauty mark on her face... but wait, It was on the other side, Bella's mark had been on the left cheek, and this lunatic had one on her right. The slight differences, coupled with the hope that he had felt upon seeing her, only fuelled his rage. It was irrational, and he knew it, it wasn't HER fault she wasn't Bella, but he couldn't help it, he yelled at her some more before finally calming down, and two of her friends came to her rescue. Theresa was her name, and she was beautiful, and stubborn, and... and she was almost crying. Her friends introduced themselves as Chad and Whitney. He and Chad hit it off instantly and made plans to play basketball in the near future. Theresa was another story. He tried to make up for yelling at her, for calling her an idiot. Now that he had a chance to relax he was completely taken by her beauty and her likeness to his Bella. He wanted her to notice him, wanted her to be as taken by him as he was by her. He asked her to dance, but she declined, almost as if he was joking, it wounded him, but he didn't let it show, that would have been suicide with a woman like this, he could tell she was the type of woman to get what she wanted, and what she wanted was nothing to do with him. He chatted casually with her and her friends for awhile, then suddenly without warning, she jumped up and told him she would love to dance, leaving his head spinning as fast as the people on the dance floor.<em>

She kept looking over his shoulder, and that was when he realized... there was another man behind him, and he was just the bait. He was upset, but he also knew that he could use this to his advantage.

Jared wiped the tears from his eyes. He wasn't sure if he was crying for Theresa or Bella anymore. Sure he loved Theresa, but as he watched the man on his knees in front of him, he wondered if he loved her for the Theresa that she was, or the Bella that she could be...  
>Ethan, he thought, had no such doubts. He loved Theresa with all of his heart, and even when confronted with his conscience that it was wrong to love her because he was married to Gwen, and even later when she was married to him, Jared, Ethan continued to love her still, because that was what made him whole. <em>Do I feel the same way? <em>Jared asked himself "_Is it Theresa that makes me whole or is it the memory of Bella, my wonderful Bella that makes me think I am whole again..."_ The thought went as quickly as it had come, for Jared realized this was the wrong time to be evaluating his love for his wife. His wife who was lying in a hospital dying, after giving birth to their daughter _but maybe this is the perfect time _the voice nagged one last time _maybe she needs true love to pull her through this, and maybe that love is Ethan...  
>STOP IT! <em>He thought so loudly he was sure he had said it out loud _THINK ABOUT YOUR WIFE! YOUR DAUGHTER! They NEED you right now!  
>But what if she's not my daughter...<em> the voice said one final time... and then it was silent

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><p>As always, Feedback is Loved and Appreciated. Thank you for reading<p> 


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I own nothing aside from the creativity behind my own storyline. All Characters and original storylines belong to the owners of Passions.

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><p>As Theresa stepped through the door she was blinded by a brilliant light. The noise around her was almost unbearable. Beeps, whooshes, people talking, someone near her hollered but she couldn't make out what they were saying. She knew it must be important though from the urgency in the voice. Suddenly... PAIN. Pain filled her chest, her head, her entire body. The beeping sound slowed until it became solid, and somewhere within herself she realized that she was dying. The pain was from her heart stopping, and she could feel her breath slowly leaving her body. She tried to hold it in, to not let it go, praying that the pain would stop and that God would spare her, give her another chance, even though she knew she didn't deserve it. Just when she thought she could hold that breath forever, someone pushed on her chest, HARD. The breath flew from her lips before she could press them shut. The compressions continued, and she heard someone beside her shouting. She still couldn't make out what they were saying but it sounded important. Suddenly the compressions stopped, and something cold on her chest, another shout and her whole body was on fire. Then, the pain was gone and everything went black, and Theresa was able to rest, peacefully.<p>

As Jared stared intently at the other man he barely noticed the doctor coming out of his wife's room. With a solemn look on his face the doctor approached him. "Mr Casey..." He started  
>"Just one minute, please Doctor," Jared interrupted, and he did something that took more strength than he thought he possessed in that moment, for he knew the bad news was coming, and he prepared for the worst.<br>"Ethan," he said placing a hand on the other mans shoulder. "Ethan, the Doctor is here and I think we both need to hear what he has to say"  
>Ethan looked up at him incredulously. The man who had fought him for so long for Theresa's love held out a hand to help him up, and offered a handkerchief to wipe his tears.<br>As the two men returned to where the doctor awaited, Ethan noticed immediately the sombre look on the man's face. Trying hard to force out any negative thoughts Ethan suddenly noticed the song playing quietly through the hospital speakers. He recognized it as an older Badfinger tune, originally from the 70s, but this particular cover was from one of those reality show singers, the show that made dreams come true, and made you a big star even if you lost, even if you were unbearable, and right now everything was unbearable. As he listened he fell into the lyrics, everything else around him faded away as the words served to bring his nightmare to life. As he listened, all his mind's eye could see were the events leading up to Theresa's collapse...

_**No I can't forget this evening  
>Or your face as you were leaving<br>But I guess that's just the way  
>The story goes<br>You always smile  
>but in your eyes<br>Your sorrow shows  
>Yes it shows<br>No I can't forget tomorrow  
>When I think of all my sorrow<br>When I had you there,  
>But then I let you go<br>And now it's only fair  
>That I should let you know<br>What you should know...**_**  
><strong>  
>"Ethan... Ethan?" It was Jared. "Ethan man, look," Said Jared looking at him sympathetically "I know this is as hard for you as it is for me... Maybe harder. We both love her so much. That is why the Dr needs our help."<br>"I... I'm sorry" Ethan said apologetically, "my mind was elsewhere and ..." he swallowed hard, knowing the news he dreaded hearing was fast approaching. "And I must have missed what you were saying." With those words Ethan braced himself for the terrible news he knew was imminent.  
>"As I was explaining to Mr Casey, Mr Winthrop, Mrs Casey seems to be in some type of hysterical coma. Medically there is no reason for it. Her brain activity appears normal, and when admitted her vitals were stable, but they seem to be rapidly decreasing, as witnessed just moments ago. We have been able to stabilize her for now, but without knowing the root of the coma, there may be nothing we can do..."<br>"But, "stammered Ethan, "but what could have caused this?"  
>"Often, cases like this are caused by an extreme emotional trauma that has occurred in the victim's life, where the victim is afraid to come back and face the threat at hand, or even a perceived future threat. Mr Casey has informed me of the..." he paused, clearing his throat and looking at Jared who nodded. He continued "of the close bond between yourself and his wife, and also that you were with her when she collapsed. Did she say anything to you? Did you two argue or disagree about anything? Any information you have could help us to help Mrs Casey, Anything at all..."<br>Jared looked at Ethan imploringly; half hoping that maybe he had misheard the conversation or at least misunderstood it. Begging Ethan, with his eyes only, to save the woman they both loved, even if it meant breaking his heart.  
>With a great deal of shock, Ethan registered what the doctor was saying. That he, Ethan, had been the cause of Theresa's collapse, near heart failure, and subsequent comatose state. In that moment everything inside of him died, horribly, painfully, and he broke down and cried again.<br>He looked to Jared, ready to tell him everything, but all he could muster was a half whispered "I'm so sorry."  
>And in that moment Jared knew it was all true.<p>

The doctor looked from one man to the other, understanding their anguish, but unable to care. He was not here to help these men, he was here to help his patient, and right now time was of the essence. "What Theresa needs now, " he said sternly, using her name for the first time, trying to sound more personal "What she needs right now is to be surrounded by people who love her, friends, family, but especially the two of you. You can deal with your personal differences later, but not here and certainly not now. She needs both of you, to love her, to support her and to encourage her to come back to us, if you can't do that, then I will have to ask you to leave now." With that he walked back into Theresa's room.  
>Ethan was about to follow when Jared pulled him aside.<br>"I know the doctor said this isn't the time, but I had to say this. Part of me wants to choke you, to beat you within an inch of your senses for what you did to my wife. I heard you arguing with her Ethan, she begged you to stop.  
>Another part of me wants to kill you for putting us all here in the first place. You never respected me, our relationship OR our marriage. You did everything you could to sabotage it. I don't understand why, because you HAD a chance. You had a chance with this amazing woman and you let her go. You moved on, you got married, you tried to start a family, but you could never let her move on, could you? You always had to make sure she held on. And when your life fell apart, and you realized you had lost her, you came running back, and fell into bed with my fiancée, on the eve of my wedding. That's not cool man.<br>There's also a part of me that wants to thank you, and that is the part that wins today. It took a lot to admit what happened, and why, and if I were in your shoes... well I'm guessing you're punishing yourself enough for the both of us right now. Where we go from here isn't something we can talk about until we know there IS a from here, so let's go and bring her back to us."  
>Ethan looked at him with a mixture of shock, and gratitude. After telling him the whole story, of the night before the wedding, the baby, and how Theresa had avoided his questions and advances ever since, Ethan knew he wasn't ready for a fight right now. Adding to his shock was the fact that Jared held out a hand to him, a gesture of possible friendship. Ethan gripped it and shook it with a ferocity that reinforced his gratitude and apologies to the man in front of him. They may not be friends, but in that moment, they were no longer enemies, and with that understanding, the two of the walked into Theresa's room, each determined to bring back the woman he loved.<p>

Voices. Quiet at first, then louder, and a little bit clearer. Everything was still foggy in her mind, and her body felt it was encased in cement. She couldn't move, couldn't open her eyes, but worst of all, even though she could hear the voices around her, she couldn't understand what they were saying. It was as if everyone around her was speaking in another language. The noises were constant, beeps and whooshes, which told her two things 1) she was in a hospital, and 2) she was attached to machines. There must have been some kind of accident, but she couldn't remember. As a matter of fact she couldn't remember anything before a few days ago, or what she assumed was a few days ago, when she became aware.  
>Became aware, that was how she thought of it. She couldn't call it waking up, because being awake meant eyes wide open and enjoying life around her. Right now all she knew was that she was aware of her surroundings – a hospital, of time passing – she judged this by a cycle of semi familiar voices she heard but didn't understand, and of being entombed in her own body. The thought had terrified her at first, but she had soon accepted it, the voices made it bearable.<br>The nurses, (she knew they were nurses because they came and went regularly, and in cycles, but didn't seem overly emotional when they spoke to her or the others in the room) were friendly when they spoke, with upbeat cheerful tones, and gentle hands when they needed to touch her. She vaguely remembered what she thought was a sponge bath. Cool liquid had trickled down her ribs. More than that she remembered what must have been an I.V. change. The burn in her arm as one came out and the other went in had been almost unbearable, but afterwards she had been given a massage and someone had gently moved her arms and legs to improve her circulation.  
>Then there were the other voices. These voices were filled with love and hope, but also shadowed with an unhidden concern. There were three that seemed to be there all the time, two males, and a female. The woman was there all the time, she could feel her close, even when she wasn't talking, sometimes she was sure the woman had fallen asleep holding her hand. The men were different though; there was always one of them there, though they rarely seemed there at the same time. She could feel the pull from one of them, and knew they must have a close connection. Maybe he was her husband, or her boyfriend... but the other... she could feel his love for her too, and it was strong, and burning, like nothing she had ever felt before, or at least not in the last few days. Both of these men loved her, and somehow she knew that she loved both of these men, but somehow, not in the same way. The pressure to understand what it meant made her head hurt, and her heart started to beat wildly. Panic rose inside her and he heard the beeps speed up just a little bit, the room filled with voices. Overwhelming voices, loud panicked almost, she knew that whatever she was worried about must be important. But also that she had to stop worrying about it for now. She tried to take a deep cleansing breath, and realized that too, was controlled by machines right now, trying again not to panic, but looking for another alternative, she felt a sharp stab in her arm, and suddenly saw a multitude of colours inside her eyelids, reds, greens, yellows and blues, swirling together in artistic masterpieces not yet painted, and watching those colours she felt herself relax, and sleep, unaware of the slowing of the beeps, and the quieting of the room around her.<p>

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><p>As always, Feedback is Loved and Appreciated. Thank you for reading<p> 


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